Not What You Make, But Who You Are

Pastor Burcham’s Sermon

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Grace, mercy and peace to you from God our Father and our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.

There is a relatively new book that’s out. I haven’t read the entire thing but I’ve read a couple of excerpts from the book and it’s a rather interesting approach. The name of the book is Mind Over Money Overcoming Money Disorders That Threaten Our Financial Freedom. The authors come at it from this point of view: They look at it as we, as human beings, have basic needs. We have basic physical needs and emotional needs, kind of that Maslow’s hierarchical thing that’s going on. And what they point out is that in our culture, in our society today, we look to money not only for our physical needs but also our emotional needs. 

Now the physical needs are easy. If you’re going to have shelter, food, clothing, it takes cash to get all that stuff. Understand that. But they make the leap and the claim that I tend to agree with that, in our culture, we also look to money or income and possessions to also fulfill our emotional needs. So it gives us a sense of security. It gives us a sense of self worth, even translates into what is love and the expression of love, all wrapped up in money.

They illustrate it through a story that they call the fancy box and I assume that it’s a true story. It’s told from the daughter of a family and Denise says this: Her father created a very successful business and decided that he would share the fruits of his labor with all of his children and that he would do that annually at Christmas time. So they would have the big Christmas celebration, everybody would open up their gifts but the highlight of the occasion is when he would pull out what he called the fancy box. And in the fancy box were a series of envelopes with each of the children’s names on them. Well, kind of. And in each envelope there was one or a series of checks that he wrote out to his children. Now she pointed out that since she was a girl and because she didn’t really directly contribute to the family business, sometimes there was no envelope with her name in the box. Otherwise, the envelopes would be handed out to all the children and, one by one, they would open the envelopes up and the tradition was then they would announce the amount of the check. If she did get a check, it was always the lowest. She said last year, her brothers received $300,000 in the envelopes from the fancy box but there was no envelope for her.

She says, “I’ve learned some life lessons according to that. Money equals love and the more that you’re loved, the more money you’re given.” She said, “I’ve also learned that money can be used to humiliate and intimidate.” You see, the message that this man was giving to his daughter is that if you’re valuable, then you’re rewarded with money. If you can contribute to the bottom line, if you can make the profits of the business larger, well then you’re more valuable than the other children who are in the family. So for her, the emotional need of love was through the giving of the checks. So some years she was loved more than other years. Some years, she was more valuable to the family than other years.

Now that may be an extreme case, but I’m convinced that, in our culture, we do the very same thing. We equate what we make, our income and our possessions, along with our self worth. Think about it for a moment, when you see somebody dressed very nice, driving a good car, lives in a fancy house, you say, “You know what, he or she has been very successful in life.” Do not we equate success with money and possessions? So the more money you have, the more possessions you have, the more successful you are, the more self worth you have.

We’ve seen it demonstrated, but really in the reverse of that, in the past 18 months. As people have lost their jobs or have had a transition to a lower paying job, we’ve seen a spike in depression. In fact, they say that those who have lost their jobs are four times as likely to enter into a very severe depression. Those who have had to transition to another job, twice as likely to suffer from severe depression because, in our culture, we’ve made this link between income and self worth. It’s a link that we have to break because it’s a false link.

Jesus cleared it up for us in Chapter 12. Chapter 12 really deals a lot with our self worth and trying to get our priorities straight but He says this, “A man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” A man’s life does not consist, his worth, his value does not consist in the income that he brings in or the possessions that he owns. So beginning this week, we need to break this link between income and self worth because it’s not about what you make, but we like to think it is. We don’t want to admit it freely but the fact of the matter is we link up our income, our possessions, they’re closely linked to our self worth.

The latest AP poll says this: A whopping 80% of Americans said the number one stressor in their life, the number one thing they worry about, finances and economy. You say, “Well, that’s because of the recession.” Okay, go back two or three years. A whopping 70+% said the two things they worry about the most, finance and the economy. What’s the number one thing that causes couples to divorce? Finances. What’s the number one thing that people argue about? Money. Because we’ve made this link between what we make, what we have and our own self worth. We’re looking to money to fulfill the emotional needs that we have. That means we live a lie. We say to ourselves, “Well, you know, we don’t really live that way. What we’re doing is, once we attain a certain level, then we’ll be okay. So I don’t equate my self worth with how much I make. I’m just trying to get to a certain point so I can feel secure.” Isn’t that what the guy is doing as Jesus tells the parable? He has this bumper crop, right? He doesn’t even take his wife out to dinner to celebrate. No. Now he’s going to work twice as hard as he did before, right? What does it say? It says, “This is what I’ll do. I’m going to tear down my barn. I’m going to build bigger ones. There I will store my grain and my goods and I will say to myself, ‘Ah, now I have plenty of good things saved up for many years. Take life easy, eat, drink and be merry.’” “Once I get the 401K back to where it was, alright, a little bit larger than what it was, then I’ll be okay. Once I get the kids through college, once I pay off the mortgage, once I get rid of my student loan, once I get the promotion, once I get. . .” It’s elusive. You’ll never attain it because there’ll always be something more.

One of the words of wisdom from scripture, Ecclesiastes 5, “Whoever loves money never has money enough. Whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income.” The fact of the matter is there’s always something bigger, better, shinier, newer. You can always have a larger nest egg. You can always be earning more interest. It’s elusive. You never attain it. Why? Because we’ve equated our self worth with our income. And so the more income we have, the larger our self worth, the more value we have. Because we’re looking for money to meet our emotional needs.

Some inherent dangers in that: When we connect our self worth and our income, we make some really lousy decisions. I mean, really lousy decisions. How many of you, don’t raise your hand, have taken a job just because it offered a bigger salary? It wasn’t because you had a passion for it. It wasn’t because you thought you could do a really good job and you could contribute but they offered you a whopper of a salary, or at least an increase, and so you took the job. How well did it turn out for you?

I have just a small example from my life, very small. When I was in college working my way through, I got a job as a janitor in Ann Arbor, Michigan cleaning offices. Not the best job in the world but it was okay. That was back when you could still smoke in offices so I had to swab out ashtrays. It was gross. But it wasn’t bad, walking around offices at 8:00 or 9:00 at night. The boss comes up to me and he says, “Would you like to make more money?” And I said, “Well, yeah. I’m in college. Of course, I want to make more money.” He says, “Well, do you mind cleaning the locker room?” “No, I don’t mind cleaning the locker room.” “Great. Head on over to the Waste Water Treatment Plant and clean the locker rooms there.” Yeah, that job stank. Oh, I’m sorry, I couldn’t resist. But that was just a job to get me through college. What if you do that with your career? What if you spend 10‑15 years miserable in a position just because of the paycheck?  How many bad decisions have you made just for the money? How much have you sacrificed for the house that you wanted to live in, the car you wanted to drive, the vacations you wanted to go on, the portfolio you wanted to build? How much have you given up for that? How many bad decisions have you made just because of the bottom line? But when we equate our self worth to our income, we’ll do that and we’ll make bad decisions.

But it even goes deeper than that. If we start equating, saying, “Well, the more money we make, the more successful we are, the more possessions we have, the more successful we are, the more value we have, then we’ll live a lie.” We’ll put on a front for everyone to make it look like we’re successful. Now the book is dated but the Millionaire Next Door did research and found out that most of the folks who lived in the affluent neighborhoods, the nice houses, drove the nice cars, had the boat in the driveway, actually had much less wealth than anyone else. They were living on the edge. They were teetering on bankruptcy all the time.

I read an article this past week, it says 40% of Americans live beyond their means. Forty percent of Americans, for every dollar they bring in, they spend a buck and a quarter. Do the math on that one. Every dollar they bring in, they spend a buck and a quarter. Why? Because we’re putting on a front. Isn’t that how we got into the mess we’re in? On the one hand, you have greed that says, “I’m going to give out these loans that really I shouldn’t be giving,” and then you have poor decisions saying, “I’m going to live beyond my means and I’m going to buy more than what I can really afford,” and then finally, it all crashed in. I know it’s more complex than that. I don’t really understand all the ins and outs but that’s the basics. That’s what happened. Why? When we start saying that our income and our possessions define success and that’s our self worth, all kinds of bad things happen. We have to break the bond. We have to break this link between our self worth and our income because it’s a false one, this idea of meeting our emotional needs through money or possessions.

Today we start with two things. The first one is this: It’s not what you make but it’s what you’ve been given. That’s a basic principle that we have to understand and I know I preach it every year. That’s because I need to hear it every year, so I assume that you need to hear it every year. It’s not what you make. It’s what you’ve been given. We live under the delusion that everything we have is ours. We worked hard for it. We earned it. We deserve it so everything I have is mine. Now I’m not denying that you don’t work hard. You work hard. I work hard. And you save up and you do everything you can. But there’s a misconception here that says everything I have is mine because I deserve it.

If you look at the parable that Jesus told, less than ten verses and even less than that when we’re talking about the farmer and yet, in those few verses, the farmer uses the term “I” or “mine” twelve times. Twelve times. He’s talking about, “Look what I have done” and “Look at all the stuff that I have” and “This is all mine and now I’m going to do this and I’m going to do that.” It’s all centered around him. Now he’s a farmer. Of all people, he should realize that the things that contributed to his success were completely out of his control. Sure, he could do certain things but the fact of the matter is most of what contributed to his bumper crop, completely out of his control. When the rain was going to come, when the sun was going to shine, when the wind was going to blow. That was God’s blessing on him. It was God who gave him the bumper crop. It was His gift. It’s not about what you make but what you’ve been given.

All that we have is a gift from God. We can work hard. We can excel at what we do but it’s the acknowledgement that we’d have nothing outside of God’s providence and blessing. From the moment of conception, when God gave you life, and if you believe the scripture, Psalm 138 says, “God formed and shaped you in your mother’s womb. He knit you together.” That means He made you the unique person that you are and He gave to you the skills, the gifts and the talents that you possess so that you can turn around and work hard and earn an income and have all these things in your life. But it traces back to God gifting you that way.

Scripture says that God created the heavens and the earth and everything in them. It’s all His. He just simply puts it on loan to us. We get into this fact and we say, “Look at all that I have.” God says, “Really?” God says He created it all and He gives it to us and He says, “Now manage it well. Be good stewards of what I’ve given to you.”

Try to look at it this way. How many of you, when your sons or daughters turned 16, bought them a car? I know that was really a gift for you because then you didn’t have to drive them around. Come on, don’t be shy. I did it. Raise your hands. Come on. Some of you had to do it. Well, you cheapskates. The next sermon’s going to be lying, folks. Alright, so you bought the car and then you borrowed it once. Didn’t ask them. Just grabbed the keys because you had to run a quick errand. And what happens when you get home? You get scolded by your teenager. “Hey, why’d you take my car?” “Your car? I bought it. I insure it and I put gas in it. Really? Your car?”

I wonder if God sometimes looks down. “Would you look at all that I have.” And He says, “Really? I gave you the gifts, the skills, the talents that created everything. Your stuff?” It’s not about what you make. It’s about what you’ve been given. That’s a baseline that we have to understand and it’s hard for us to grasp that. It’s what God’s given you. Yes, you work hard but you’re able to do that because God allows it, because God makes it happen. It’s not about what you make. It’s what you’ve been given.

It’s not about what you make but it’s about who you are. We will no longer let society and culture define our value. We’ll let God define our value. God tells us what we’re worth. Really, the first part of Chapter 12 in Luke, he’s doing an excellent job of that. Listen to what he says here. This is Verse 6, “Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet, not one of them is forgotten by God and these very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid. You’re worth far more than many sparrows.” God says, “I’ll define how important you are. I’ll tell you what your self worth is.” And God tells us that our self worth is all wrapped up in the fact that He calls us His children, that we have an identity in Christ.

If you were here for the last series of messages, we looked at 1 Peter and 1 Peter’s all wrapped around that identity that we have in Christ. Let’s revisit it one more time. 1 Peter 1, he says this, “For you know that it was not with perishable things, such as silver or gold, that you were redeemed. No, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.” You want to know what your value is? You want to know how important you are? God says that you’re so valuable that He must turn His back as His Son cried out to Him from the cross. God says that He would take our guilt and our sins and place them upon His Son and watch Him go through hell instead of us. That’s how valuable you are to Him.

You want to know what your true value is? The Son volunteered for the job. He didn’t have to be forced or coerced. Jesus willingly came and became one of us and He laid down His life so you and I could live, so that life in this world is just a little blip and we can have an eternity with Him. God says that your value transcends this world. You can’t equate it to a paycheck or a house or a boat or a car. It’s so far beyond that. God says your value transcends this world. That’s our self worth. That’s the corner that we have to turn. And we have to look to God and His love and grace to define us and to tell us our value and to meet that need for love in our lives because God has it in abundance. And that changes us. It changes our whole perception over our money and our possessions.

Some of you, this past year, have had to have a change in perception. Many of you, some of you, have lost your jobs, had to reposition in other jobs. I’ve had a chance to talk to a number of you and there are two consistent themes that I’ve heard through this last year. One is, “We didn’t know that we could live on so little.” And two, “We didn’t realize that the things we had to give up, we just didn’t really miss all that much.”

I’m always saying that God can take the worst and turn it around for something good. I wonder if all of us can learn from what’s happened in the last 18 months and see the lesson that God wants us to really get? I don’t want to take away from the anxiety and the stress and the pain of those of you who have gone through the whole jobless thing and, if you’re there right now, I can’t imagine the pain and the struggle you’re going through, but is God teaching us all a lesson through that? Is He trying to change our perspective?

I believe the lesson He wants us to learn is it’s not about what you make but it’s about who you are. Amen.

Copyright 2009 Gloria Dei Lutheran Church